- For the episode, see The Search.
- See also: Full transcript on transcripts.foreverdreaming.org
- Erin: Holly is ruining Michael's life. He thinks she is so special and she's so not. Her personality is like a 3. Her sense of humor is a 2. Her ears are like a 7 and a 4. Add it all up and what do you get? 16. And he treats her like she's a perfect 40. It's nuts.
- Dwight: You drive. I got a car full of fox meat.
- Gabe: “Darn it Bob. I told you not to buy a Sabre brand lifeboat.” [laughter]
- Kevin: Nice!
- Gabe: No, not nice. Terrible. Doesn't even include the fact that they're dogs.
- Andy: Do the next one.
- Gabe: "Wake up, Fred. The power cord on your Sabre printer shocked you into a coma, and you're dreaming you're a dog on a desert island."
- Darryl: Dreaming he's a dog on an island.
- Gabe: Uh, excuse me, excuse me. How does the speaker know what the guy in the coma is dreaming?
- Phyllis: Well, if you think it's so easy, Gabe, why don't you try it?
- Gabe: Umm... “You don't have to sniff my rear end anymore, Bob, I'm the only one here.” Ha.
- Oscar: That's tasteless, Gabe.
- Gabe: Tasteless?
- Oscar: Tasteless.
- Gabe: More tasteless than this...”is that a palm tree or did Gabe get skinnier? Either way, let's pee on it.” [laughter]
- Pam: Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have a winner.
- Phyllis: Yes.
- Kevin: Yes, well done!
- Oscar: Who's is it? Who wrote that?
- Phyllis: Yeah, who wrote it?
- Angela: Please. It was easy once I decided I wanted the dog to piss on Gabe.
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