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Michael: Holly and I are like Romeo and Juliet, and the office is like the dragon that kept them apart.


Erin: So tell me about your new girlfriend.

Andy: She's neat. I met her at Darryl's cousin's party. We were the only two white people there.

Erin: Aw, cute.


Dwight: I have had intercourse in the office.

Michael: Alright--

Dwight: As has Angela.

Angela: Dwight!

Dwight: As has Ryan, as has Kelly, as has Meredith, as has Phyllis, as has Darryl, as has Creed, as has Michael and as has Holly!

Kevin: As has Kevin.

Angela: With who?

Kevin: She goes to another school.


Ryan: Anybody can be Prince Charming one day a year, with the dinner and the flowers and all that, but you know what impresses me? When a guy can do that no days a year

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