Dunderpedia: The Office Wiki
For the episode, see Grief Counseling.
See also: Full transcript on transcripts.foreverdreaming.org
Dwight: When I die, I wanna be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever because I will have used that time to figure out exactly why I died and what moves I could have used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in.

Ryan: When I was five, my mom told me that my fish went to the hospital... in the toilet. And, it never came back, so... we had a funeral for it. And I remember thinking, "I'm a little too old for this" and I was five.

Creed: Ed was decapitated.
Michael: What?
Dwight: Really?
Creed: He was drunk as a skunk, he was flying down Route 6. He slides under an 18-wheeler. Pop. It snaps right off.
Michael: Oh my God.
Dwight: That is the way to go. Instant death. Very smart.
Creed: You know a human can go on living for several hours after being decapitated.
Dwight: You're thinking of a chicken.
Creed: What did I say?