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For the episode, see Email Surveillance.
See also: Full transcript on transcripts.foreverdreaming.org
Pam: It's like squishing a spider under a book. It's gonna be really gross, but I have to look and make sure it's really dead. So, if you guys see anything...

Dwight: I think one of the greatest things about modern America is the computerization of medical records. As a volunteer sheriff, I can look up anyone's psychiatric records or surgical histories. Yeast infections. There are a huge number of yeast infections in this county. Probably because we are down river from that old bread factory.

Jim: It's true - I'm having a party. I've got three cases of imported beer, a karaoke machine, and I didn't invite Michael...so, three ingredients for a great party. And it's nothing personal - I just think that, if he were there, people wouldn't be able to relax, you know, have fun - and my roommate wants to meet everybody, because I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm making Dwight up. He is very real!
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