The Merger Quotes


 * See episode The Merger

Dwight: I am fast. To give you a reference point. I'm somewhere between a snake and a mongoose. And a panther.

Pam: Am I being mean to Dwight? I don't know, I did just make him run around the building, and I have no intention of timing him - this isn't even a stopwatch, it's a digital thermometer! He does make my life harder sometimes, and on purpose - like, he tried to put meters on the bathroom stalls as a way of bringing in more money for the company...I should really get back to work.


 * Dwight: Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager.
 * Andy: Andy Bernard, Regional Director in charge of Sales.
 * Dwight: So, you'll be reporting to me, then...
 * Andy: Um, on the contrary...
 * Dwight: My title has "manager" it is...
 * Andy: And I'm a "director"....

Andy: Am I trying to get under his skin? Yes...because, the angrier (Dwight) gets, the more marginalized he becomes. Meanwhile, Andy Bernard is out there...layin' on the charm.

Stanley: I don't know who these new people think they are; I've sat downwind of Phyllis's stinky perfumes for years...never said a word.

Andy: Dwight may have won the battle. But I will win… the next battle.


 * Martin: What the hell is with this guy?
 * Stanley: Got an hour? I'll try to explain.


 * Stanley: Trust me, it only gets worse!
 * Martin: Is he always like this?
 * Ryan: Sometimes he brings more costumes...
 * Hannah: When do people work?
 * Phyllis: We find little times during the day.
 * Karen: How are we gonna get home?
 * Phyllis: Bob Vance has an air pump - he said he'd fill all our tires up...

Karen: Bob Vance, of Vance Refrigeration?