Andy's Ancestry Quotes

Fake Jim: Morning, Dwight

Dwight: Who are you?

Fake Jim: Who am I? I’m Jim. We’ve been working together for twelve years. Ha, Weird joke, Dwight.

Dwight: You’re not Jim. Jim’s not Asian

Fake Jim: You seriously never noticed? Hey, hats off to you for not seeing race.

Dwight: Alright then Jim. Ahhh, why don’t you tell me about that sale that you made yesterday?

Fake Jim: Uh, Wellington systems? Sold them 10 cases of 24-pound letter stock. Or, were you talking about Krieger-Murphy? Because I didn’t close that one yet, but I’m hoping I’ve got a voicemail from Paul Krieger waiting for me.

Voicemail: Please enter your password. [Fake Jim enters password] You have one new message.

Dwight: How did you know? No! No, no! That is sensitive information only for employees, not outsiders!

Fake Jim: Dwight, cut it out, I’m trying to work.

Dwight: You don’t work here! You’re not Jim!

Pam: Jim, I got us that dinner reservation. Grico’s at 7:30.

Fake Jim: Oh great, can’t wait. [Kisses Pam]

Pam: [talking head] Jim’s at the dentist this morning. And Steve is an actor friend of ours.

Dwight: I don’t know who you are, but you are not Jim. This is Jim!

[Dwight shows fake Jim of the Halpert family portrait but notices that Jim and the kids have been replaced with fake Jim and Asian kids]

Dwight: Oh my—! Oh d—! Oh, how did—? [gasps] Huhhhhh!