St. Patrick's Day Quotes

For the episode, see St. Patrick's Day.

Michael: Green M&M's! Nature's Viagra! Dwight: Dweedle Dee and Dweedle Dumb-ass have been away on maternity leave. Now Dweedle Dumb-ass is back, and we have a problem. Yes, getting hooked on Mega-Desk was my own damn fault. But … I don’t care about assigning blame. All I care about is Mega-Desk. That is all I care about. Getting. More. Mega-Desk. Dwight: They say that no man is an island. False! I am an island and this island is volcanic. And it is about to erupt. With the molten hot lava of strategy! Erin: I’m a little sick but I don’t want to miss my date with Andy. I’ll get better. Whenever I’m sick it goes away within a few hours. Except once, when I was in the hospital from age three to six.

Todd Packer: What's up, Butt plug?

Angela: Yes, I’m anxious to get off work. But let me be clear. It’s not to celebrate St Patrick’s Day. It’s so I can protest St. Patrick’s Day.

Jim: Yeah. We should be able to have that right over to you by Monday. Yeah no problem. [Reveal Jim behind Quad-Desk] Thank you.

Dwight: What the hell is this?

Jim: Oh!

Dwight: This is not Mega-Desk.

Jim: No, it’s not. They call it Quad-Desk.

Dwight: That’s ridiculous, this is made up of three desks.

Jim: Oh my God. We’re going to have to re-name it then aren’t we? [Dwight’s phone rings. He crawls into nook under Jim’s Quad-Desk]

Dwight: Hello, Dwight Schrute?